today

Guys, I literally just spent five  ten full minutes writing like three sentences of four different blog posts.

I know I have something to say, I just don't know how to best express it. Because the truth is, there are so many thoughts going on in my head right now. So many different things pulling for my attention.

Namely though, is the realization that today is my last night at the University of Texas. The last time I will wake up to those darn buses that drove me crazy ALL year. The last time I will get a salad from the salad bar. The last time to study in my favorite spots. And tomorrow is the last time I will take an exam here. 

Goodness, that's a lot of "lasts". 

But you know, strangely, I'm not completely heartbroken. Am I sad? Yeah, there are many things I will miss... relationships I worked hard to cultivate, dreams that I had stemming from attending this school, the pride and community that I felt by attending such a wonderful university with prestige attached to it's name. 

I don't regret any of it though. Coming here, trying what I have, learning what I've learned has helped me grow. It's helped me realize who I really am, but also who I'm not. This past year I have seen such immense growth in myself, how can I regret it? 

True, today marks the end of my time here. But if nothing else, I've learned that life is never stagnant. I've learned that each day is a chance at happiness and that you can't take for granted any one of those days. Life is more than the "big" moments, for they pass along just as fast as any other. High School, graduation, my freshman year of college (yikes!).

But gosh, guys I'm so happy. I'm so incredibly blessed to be given such an experience. To be allowed the opportunity to figure myself out a little bit more. To grow up a little. To change a lot and ultimately, to be able to see those changes. 

I don't have a clue what my future holds. I like to say that I do, because I feel the need to have "direction" in my life. But honestly, things in life change so quickly. In a flash, in an instant. So therefore, I'm trying to savor each moment, because there will never be one like it again. 

Hooray for life! And hooray for embracing each second you get to be here, mess up, learn and grow. What a gift!